Genius
by Warren Zevon and Larry Klein
Dm C
I've got a bitter pot of je ne sais quoi
Dm C
Guess what--I'm stirring it with a monkey's paw
Bb A
Since I saw you coming out of my barber's shop
Dm C
In that skimpy little halter top
Did you light the candles? Did you put on "Kind of Blue?"
Did you use that Ivy League voodoo on him, too?
He thinks he'll be alright but he doesn't know for sure
Like every other unindicted coconspirator
F C
Mata Hari had a house in France
Dm C
Where she worked on all her secret plans
Bb A
Men were falling for her sight unseen
Dm C Dm C
She was a genius
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There's a a face in every window of the Songwriters' Neighborhood
Everybody's your best friend when you're doing well--I mean good
The poet who lived next door when you were young and poor
Grew up to be a backstabbing entrepreneur
F C
Albert Einstein was a ladies' man
Dm C
While he was working on his universal plan
Bb A
He was making out like Charlie Sheen
Dm
He was a genius
Bb A
When you dropped me and you staked your claim
Dm F7
On a V.I.P. who could make your name
Bb A
You latched on to him and I became
Dm
A minor inconvenience
Your protégé don't care about art
I'm the one who always told you you were smart
You broke my heart into smithereens
And that took genius
You and the barber make a handsome pair
Guess what--I never liked the way he cut your hair
I didn't like the way he turned your head
But there's nothing I can do or say I haven't done or said
Everybody needs a place to stand
And a method for their schemes and scams
If I could only get my record clean
I'd be a genius
